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Letters from Our Family (November 2017)

To my Black and Pink family,

My name is william, but I prefer to go by Lisa Autumn. I am a 35 year old white transgender, born a male but am truly female. I was first diagnosed with “gender dysphoria” in february 2016, and have been trying to get on the hormones since. I first read a copy of the Black and Pink Newsletter while incarcerated in Marianna FCI in Florida in June 2015, and I loved it. This is my first time writing to you all. It is still hard for me to be open and tell people I am transgender, but I’m getting there. All my life I have struggled with my inner feelings, dealing with depression and anxiety. I always felt I should have been born a girl, but didn’t know how to go about taking the steps to begin my transition, and I was scared to ask anyone. But while incarcerated in Marianna, i met a few people who helped me learn the steps. Two in particular Nicole and Squinty, were inspirations to finally have the courage to come out and be me. I left Federal custody in April of 2016, and went into New Jersey State Prison custody. I only have 8 more months before I am to be released, and I will continue to go for the hormones after i am released. I want to thank my brothers and sisters at Marianna for the love and support they’ve shown me- Quack, Nicole, Squinty, Frankie. And thank you all who are part of my LGBTQ family. I love you all. And I hope those who are still struggling with those feelings find the courage to come out. Your are not alone. There is help out there for us all!

Blessed be!
Lisa Autumn ( William) New Jersey

 

 

Black and Pink family,

Hello family! I am a thirty-seven year old transgender. I am a homo sexual male that inwardly I feel I’m a straight female. I have been a homosexual since I’ve been 9 years old. I’ve always known there wasn’t something right with me beyond just being gay. When I was twenty-nine years old I began to realize the thing that wasn’t right with me was that I’m not just a gay male but also I’m a feminine gay male. By the time I was thirty I began living more like a female. I am finally living more comfortable in my body. I would consider myself as a transgender person. I was born a male gender but am happier and more comfortable living as female. I’m still a male and don’t plan on changing that; however, I am an extremely feminine male and am happy living this way. Even Though I’ve lived my life as a gay man I was missing something until I began expressing myself as a feminine male. I look like a male but I live and act like a female. I’m assuming I am a transgender. That is a new term for me. I hope I’m using the term correctly. I am currently serving an eighteen year sentence in the Indiana Department of Corrections. I am thankful for the LGBTQ. The prison system has put in effect several things that could make life in prison a little easier for us transgenders. The one thing I just don’t understand is the whole issue of not being allowed to have a relationship with consensual sex with another same sex inmate. I am gonna be in prison for a long time and I might find someone I enjoy being around; We might decide to become a couple. But when the prison realizes we are together they will make a point to separate us. If we chose to indulge in consensual sex and the prison finds out, we would get in trouble. We are adults in prison. Why is it such a problem to be a couple in prison? As for myself i am gonna be in prison for a long time. It gets to be very lonely in here at times. I am planning to pursue a relationship with another inmate if one comes in my path while in prison. This is a big concern for me. If anyone can help me with this please write the B&P newsletter. I will read and be thankful for any help.

Jasmine

 

Stand Strong by Rickie Washington

Hello Black and Pink family.

This is my first time writing in. My name is rickie. I’d like to share a bit about what i deal with because of being gay. I have to deal with verbal abuse and dysfunctional people wanting to control my life and dictate to me how to live it. Of course I stand my ground and continue to be myself. I don’t like their behavior, but I realize that they are immature, some have been indoctrinated with hate ideologies, others are afraid ant insecure and worried about what their friends might think if they don’t agree with them. I’ve come to realize that some people can’t or won’t change and will always hate gays. Others might accept me as I am and come to appreciate me. The one thing that we all have is our freedom to choose. Don’t ever let anyone take that away. Those that hate- well I wish them well in my mind and move on. Brothers and sisters, stand strong. Remember we’re family. I cope remembering that others among us face similar difficulties. I also meditate and do yoga. Lisa in CA I enjoyed your article in the December newsletter. You lifted me up girl. Keep the positive attitude. Shawty Blue you’re an inspiration girl. Smile! Anna S. you’re and inspiration too. Keep strong. Juicy Queen Bee, be yourself. You’re beautiful. Stand strong girl. All you in the black and Pink family. I love you all. Juicy Queen Bee- your voice is beautiful too.

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